Getting the music thing

In addition to the Interwebs portion of Prong Two, I've also recruited my friends to do a little matchmaking. If they know an awesome single guy, they are duty-bound to introduce me to this guy. Of course, this prompts several questions about what kind of Dude I'm looking for.

Having been around the love circuit a few times, I've got some ideas about what works and what doesn't work for me in the romance arena. I do not subscribe to the "opposites attract" philosophy. I intend to spend lots of time doing awesome things and building a kick-ass life with The Dude. If he is, for example, deeply immersed in the world of ExTreme Mountain-Bike Paint-Ball Battles and plans to spend most of his free time charting battle plans and putting new shocks on his ride while I'm spending every spare moment feeding my music addiction ... well, that's not really in step with the whole Doing Awesome Things Together plan, is it?

Therefore, I usually tell my match-making friends that The Dude needs to be someone who Gets the Music Thing. But what the fuck does that mean, right? At first, even I didn't know. But I've been thinking about it recently, and I'm starting to figure it out:

Getting the music thing means that The Dude probably (probably) plays an instrument of some kind - not that he's making his own albums or gigging every Friday night, but the idea of spending an afternoon learning a few new chords on his guitar or digging out his old grade six book and bashing away at his piano isn't unheard of. Jam sessions or campfire singalongs or Friday nights in the basement with some guitars and some beer all sound like AWESOME ways to spend his free time. And if he doesn't play, that's okay too. As long as he 'gets it'.

Getting the music thing means that sometimes the music is on as background noise, but not always. Often I'm not just hearing the music, I'm LISTENING to the music. I know what tunes to turn on when I've just kicked ass at work; I know what'll make me feel better when I've had my heart broken; road trips are all about the playlists for me; there's a soundtrack to my life and it's something I've spent time thinking about. The Dude gets this.

As Ian McEwan said:

There are these rare moments when musicians together touch something sweeter than they've ever found before in rehearsals or performance, beyond the merely collaborative or technically proficient, when their expression becomes as easy and graceful as friendship or love. This is when they give us a glimpse of what we might be, of our best selves, and of an impossible world in which you give everything you have to others, but lose nothing of yourself. Out in the real world there exists detailed plans, visionary projects for peaceable realms, all conflicts resolved , happiness for everyone, for ever - mirages for which people are prepared to die and kill. Christ's kingdom on earth, the workers' paradise, the ideal Islamic state. But only in music, and only on rare occasions, does the curtain actually lift on this dream of community, and it's tantalizing conjured, before fading away with the last notes.

The Dude is the kind of person who will totally dig that quote.

So... easy peasy, right? There are bound to be several thousand guys kicking around who are awesome and single and 'get it', They're probably hiding out in some underground bachelor jam session wondering where the hell girls like me are hanging out. If you see them, tell them I say "hey".